Although my story is not your story, my once sad and lonely heart remembers and feels compelled to tell you – DON’T GIVE UP.

KEEP PRAYING.

KEEP DAYDREAMING.

KEEP “PUTTING YOURSELF OUT THERE”.

There was a period of time in my twenties that I lived in five different apartments. My roommates kept getting married.  I finally moved into my own place.  It was there that I reached such a low that I finally swallowed my pride and went to counseling. After my therapist recommended I take an anti-depressant about ten times, I swallowed my pride again and agreed.  I had been so depressed that I wrote in my prayer journal one night “I want to die.  I want my work on earth here to be finished.”

But that apartment is also where “prayer, wine, chocolate” was born.  It was that period of my life that God brought me three girlfriends going through their own rough times that we came together and started praying the rosary.  That apartment is also where I lived when I went on my first date with Matt, who is now my husband.

The truth is and was: God is in control.  God LOVES you.  God our Father hears your prayers.  Just like the grape vine has to struggle to produce the best grape – and ultimately the finest wine, the Lord is with you and molding you into the finest soul your future spouse could ever marry.

KEEP PRAYING.

KEEP DAYDREAMING.

KEEP “PUTTING YOURSELF OUT THERE”.

Besides going to counseling and taking that antidepressant, there are things I did that helped me on the way.  There are other things I wish I did, that I would like to share with you too.  Some may make you laugh at me and shake your head.  That’s fine.  Sometimes I’m ridiculous.  Sometimes me being ridiculous led to good things

What I did that helped me on my journey from single to married:

1.  I kept a prayer journal. Writing down my prayers helped me communicate my feelings to Jesus.  Helped me think about what my heart truly desired. I also wrote to saints asking them to pray for me.  I really feel like writing out my feelings is a type of therapy.  I used an old fashioned notebook.
2. I signed up for online dating.  Since my faith is the most important aspect of my life, I did CatholicSingleMingle.com and I think CatholicSingles.com.  I don’t know if either of these still exist.  I did meet a couple guys that were really awesome.  One I dated for 6 months.  I’m glad I did it.  Recently my husband and I met a couple who met on match.com (they’re married now).  They are very faithful Catholics and really fun!  Another website I’ve heard of is “plenty of fish”.  If your faith is extremely important to you, communicate that on your profile.  Give it a shot . . . you never know.
3. I bought a book titled, “How to Make Someone Fall In Love with You”.  This is the part where I expect you to be shaking your head and saying, “that’s ridiculous”.  At first it was silly.  I was head over heels for a guy I worked with, and he was only somewhat interested.  I thought, let me try this book.  Ha!  Well, that book suggested I write down every characteristic I had hoped my future spouse would possess.  It guided me with questions – many I would not have thought of on my own.  I still have that description – and Matt fits 90% of it!  I tried finding this book on Amazon, and actually found several with that title.  If you want to check them out, here they are: How to Make Anyone Fall in Love with You, How to Make Someone Fall in Love with You and How To Make Someone Fall in Love with You.
4. I continued making new friends.  As many of my old friends left the single life, I found myself meeting other people who were either still single, going through a divorce or divorced.  These friends are now also “old” friends.  It was great having people to go out with after work and have “girls’ nights” with.  The rosary group started with one friend I had known for awhile, and two new friends.  These relationships helped me make the decision to go to therapy, gave me great times that our now great memories, and created a prayer group that still exists today.

What I wish I did:

1.  The therapist I went to encouraged me to join something called the “Sierra Club”.  She told me they did things like hiking.  I scoffed at the idea.  Do you know how much I want to go hiking now?  My husband is afraid of heights (something I did not learn until we were married).  I fear going on a hike with him, because what if he starts out fine and then we’re up on a cliff and he starts experiencing vertigo?  That would not be good.  I should of went hiking!  Maybe I would have made some friends that I would still go on a hike with once in a while!  Remember, you and your future spouse are not going to sit around and stare at each other for fifty years.  Do things you find fun!
2. Travel.  My sister is in her 30’s and is single.  She’s been to Europe at least three times.  She goes on ski trips, mission trips, and “I just want to go” trips.  My friends went to Ireland when I was single.  I just thought, “I don’t have the money”.  I had a credit card.  I could of gone.  Go.

Again, DON’T GIVE UP. DON’T LOOK BACK.  GOD WANTS YOU TO LOOK AHEAD, AND LOOK AHEAD WITH HOPE!  KEEP PRAYING FOR WHATEVER OR WHOEVER YOUR HEART DESIRES!

If you want me to pray for you specifically, I will!  Just say the word!  Sending you love, hug and prayers! <3 Amy

The post A Valentine Post for Those Who Are Single and Not Loving It appeared first on Prayer Wine Chocolate.

But in the winter, simply wandering leisurely is a rare act.  In the bitter cold I rush everywhere in the hopes to get to the next warmer place.  However, there’s something uplifting about being outside.  Feeling fresh air on your face, basking in the sun’s light and looking out as far as the horizon brings a calmness to my soul.  When everything is covered in dazzling snow, that especially helps the dreariness of winter slip away . . . at least a little.

One of my goals for 2016 is to get out on a date with my husband at least once a month. Before we got married, I thought this would be easy and just happen.  I’m not sure how it works in other marriages, but in ours, date nights are seldom.  If we do go out, I’m usually exhausted by 9:00 p.m.  What was first going to be dinner and a movie has more than once become “dinner and let’s go home, I’m tired”.  Pathetic, I know.

But good news, we did go on a date in January! My parents watched our son from lunch time until a little after dinner; and we headed out from our suburb of Philly home and stopped at Peddler’s Village for soup and wine.  From there we took a very short drive into New Jersey where we enjoyed our own little “taste of Napa” at Old York Cellars. To our delight, Old York Cellars comped our wine and chocolate tasting!  I had planned on writing about this date no matter what, so this just made me love this vineyard even more!

We had such an amazing day, I want to encourage everyone I know to embrace the Day Date and head to a Vineyard!  If you live within an hour and a half of Ringoes, NJ, I strongly recommend Old York Cellars.

5 Reasons to Go on a Day Date to a Vineyard

1. The View.  Looking out at the vineyard was calming and peaceful.  The brightness of the snow added joy to my mood.  Plus, it was daylight, so not only can you see more of the view, if you are like me, your out before you are exhausted!  Old York Cellars had a gorgeous patio set up and welcomes guests to bring snacks or a meal and purchase a bottle to enjoy outside!  Three women were out there embracing the day, soaking up the view -and the cold didn’t seem to bother them at all!  
2. The Tour of the Winery.  The tour of the winery was both educational and entertaining.  My husband was fascinated by the details of growing and harvesting the grapes and learning about the entire wine making process.  I found it interesting that it takes 600-800 grapes to make one bottle of wine and was laughing out loud when the tour guide spout out a ton of information that Matt understood, then ended with, “It’s a beautiful thing monks figured this shit out years ago”.  Matt favored the education, I enjoyed the entertainment
3. The Wine.  The wine.  The wine and cheese.  Then Wine and Chocolate.  When we went to Old York Cellars all three were available!  Most wineries not only host tastings, but also have wine and food pairings as well.
4. It’s Both Unique and Romantic. Don’t get me wrong, I love going out to dinner – but a change of scenery is nice – and maybe even adds some spice.  The time you spend together at a vineyard provides an opportunity to walk outside, taste new wines, discuss likes and dislikes and learn something new.  Many wineries also have other forms of entertainment like an art gallery and host entertainers like comedians and musicians. (Old York Cellars has a free art gallery and monthly wine and comedy nights).
5. The Date will Continue.  You’re probably going home with some awesome wine which will allow the “party” to continue that night or provide for a fun date night later in the week or month.  I’m not sure we had any intention of buying a bottle of wine . . . but we ended up buying 5 bottles of wine!  It seems that no matter what winery we visit, Matt and I discover there is at least one that is so good we want to enjoy a bottle at home.  At this particular tasting we were both floored by how “clean” the wine tasted.  WE loved the cabernet and their “What Exit White”.  Plus, Old York Cellars donates $1 from every bottle of their “What Exit” line to charity.

So if you you’re looking for a new date idea, may I suggest Winter Windering?  Dress warm, go out in the daylight, and wander around the grounds of a vineyard.  Enjoy the view, enjoy each other, enjoy the wine.  Cheers!

If you live in or around PA and New Jersey (or plan on visiting sometime soon), enter to win tasting coupons to Old York Cellars!  Enter today!  Contest ends on February 22, 2016.  To enter, click here: a Rafflecopter giveaway

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