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Mother Teresa: A Saint For Adoptive Families

Amy — Mon, 05 Sep 2016 02:19:46 +0000

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Bill Murray and Melissa McCarthy starred in a film together titled “Saint Vincent”. One of the main characters of the film, Oliver, is the 12 year-old adopted son of Melissa McCarthy’s character, Maggie.

Maggie and Oliver move into the house next door to Vincent (played by Bill Murray). Since Maggie is working a new job that is demanding more hours than she would like, Vincent becomes Oliver’s unlikely companion and care-taker.

In the film, Oliver’s character was assigned a project in which he must find a real-life person that models a saint. The director of the film, Ted Melfi, was inspired to make this motion picture from his own personal experience. The sudden death of his brother led to Melfi adopting his niece. When his niece was assigned a saint project, she chose to focus on St. William of Rochester and him. That moment tug his heart strings and lingered in his head, so he decided that it was a story he wanted to tell.

The patron saint of adoption is William of Rochester. Very little is known about William, except that his adopted son, David, murdered him.

I don’t know about you, but this makes me scratch my head and wonder . . . why? It also makes me feel bad for every adopted child that ever had to do a saint project. Being adopted has it’s own challenges, and then finding the patron saint was murdered by his adopted son – well, that doesn’t exactly inspire hope. I can’t imagine what would go through a child’s mind doing that research. And to top it all off, according to catholic.org, there is no record of Saint William of Rochester’s canonization.

According to an interview with Boston.com; When Melfi was asked about what he hoped the audience would take away from the story, he stated:

“What I intended for them to take away is that every human being has value,’’ Melfi says. “A single mom, an old, curmudgeonly vet, a Russian prostitute, a Catholic priest teacher, an adopted boy—every character, every human being has value.’’

It’s not often that we hear that reminder from Hollywood.

As faithful Christians, we know that every human certainly does have value.

And today, a woman who demonstrated that truth better than anyone I can think of in recent history, Mother Teresa of Calcutta, was canonized a saint.

In his homily at the Mass of Canonization, Pope Francis reminded the world of how Mother Teresa believed in the value of every human life.

Mother Teresa, in all aspects of her life, was a generous dispenser of divine mercy, making herself available for everyone through her welcome and defense of human life, those unborn and those abandoned and discarded. She was committed to defending life, ceaselessly proclaiming that “the unborn are the weakest, the smallest, the most vulnerable”.

Pope Francis also reminded us of how Mother Teresa inspired hope in those that felt discouraged and under-valued:

Mother Teresa loved to say, “Perhaps I don’t speak their language, but I can smile”. Let us carry her smile in our hearts and give it to those whom we meet along our journey, especially those who suffer. In this way, we will open up opportunities of joy and hope for our many brothers and sisters who are discouraged and who stand in need of understanding and tenderness.

Looking back at Mother Teresa’s life, one can find so many inspiring words and recall many speeches directed towards world leaders. One in particular comes to mind. On February 3, 1994, Mother Teresa of Calcutta spoke at the National Prayer Breakfast in Washington, DC. Those in attendance included President Bill Clinton, his wife, Hillary and VP Al Gore.

I often read quotes from this speech, such as:

But I feel that the greatest destroyer of peace today is abortion, because it is a war against the child, a direct killing of the innocent child, murder by the mother herself.

and

And if we accept that a mother can kill even her own child, how can we tell other people not to kill one another?

But, unknown to many, Mother Teresa continued in that same speech to speak of adoption:

I will tell you something beautiful. We are fighting abortion by adoption – by care of the mother and adoption for her baby. We have saved thousands of lives. We have sent word to the clinics, to the hospitals and police stations: “Please don’t destroy the child; we will take the child.” So we always have someone tell the mothers in trouble: “Come, we will take care of you, we will get a home for your child.” And we have a tremendous demand from couples who cannot have a child – but I never give a child to a couple who have done something not to have a child. Jesus said. “Anyone who receives a child in my name, receives me.” By adopting a child, these couples receive Jesus but, by aborting a child, a couple refuses to receive Jesus.

Please don’t kill the child. I want the child. Please give me the child. I am willing to accept any child who would be aborted and to give that child to a married couple who will love the child and be loved by the child.

From our children’s home in Calcutta alone, we have saved over 3000 children from abortion. These children have brought such love and joy to their adopting parents and have grown up so full of love and joy.

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As an adoptive mother who longs and prays for more children, my heart leaps with gratitude when I read these words.

I want to thank Saint Teresa of Calcutta for speaking about the hope and life adoption provides. I want to thank her for letting me and all other adoptive parents know that she saw the value in adoption – for everyone involved.

Thank you, Saint Teresa of Calcutta, for speaking of and praising the beauty of adoption.

Thank you, Saint Teresa of Calcutta, for reminding us to love the expectant mother.

Thank you, Saint Teresa of Calcutta, for sharing with the world how adopted children bring love and hope to their parents and they too grow up full of love and joy.

I don’t know what Saint Teresa of Calcutta is the official patron of; but in my heart, she is a patron for adopted children, women who have placed a child with an adoptive family and adoptive parents.

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Saint Teresa of Calcutta, pray for us . . . and thank you.

Love,

Amy

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Mother Teresa’s Advice For Teachers

Amy — Fri, 26 Aug 2016 14:49:20 +0000

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Tosha and Jeanice walked into my classroom and gave me one of those looks only women have the power to give.

The look that says, “I don’t like you and I don’t trust you.”

I felt it penetrate me. It was my first year as a teacher, and I was doing my best to act un-phased.

But I was phased. The way they looked at me got me to the core. And I will admit, I was a little intimidated.

It probably didn’t help that they were entering my classroom because I was their “math” teacher and I knew I went to school to be a social studies teacher. I was perfectly capable of teaching my students how to find the area of a triangle and pre-algebra; but the way they looked at me magnified every thought of self-doubt I had inside of me.

How was I going to teach these girls? They were tough. They were street wise. They saw things and knew things girls their age really shouldn’t know, hear or see. How could I reach them?

The reasons why parents choose certain schools for their children vary greatly. Some choose schools because they want their child to learn about their religion, others choose schools because they like the community they are in and feel the district is decent. Others choose a school based on academic intensity. Some choose a school because attending it is a family tradition.

In the city, many parents choose a school based on “where will my child be the safest?”

Even if some parents do not admit that is why they chose a school; it’s a truth. The school I taught in was a Catholic school. The education provided there was superb. The faith instilled was solid. But that was not why most parents chose that school. Parents chose that school because it was a safer space that the public schools around it.

The neighborhood in which this school was located had gangs living and recruiting in it. The crime rate was high and it was one of the neighborhoods you often heard about on the news when they talked about shootings. The realities these girls faced were not typical of most American 12 year olds.

But for some reason; God put them in my care for an hour or so a day. I wanted to reach them.

While thinking about how; I came across some advice from Mother Teresa. She had just passed away the week I met these two girls; so she was being discussed on the news and in many circles.

I remember reading these words credited to her:

Smile at one another; that will help you grow in love with each other.

For the life of me, I can not find this quote anywhere now. But back then, I read it somewhere. I thought, what a great idea. I can try that!

So I went into work and thought, I am going to test this idea.

Tosha and Jeaniece walk into my class right next to each other like they did every day. They have their tough girl faces on. I look at them and give them the most fake, cheesy smile I have ever given. They look at each other and crack up.

They were totally laughing at me and thinking I was nuts.

But I broke them. That tough girl look went away for a brief moment.

I continued to give them a fake smile every day they came in. Eventually I was laughing at myself.

Eventually, my smile became real. Eventually, that tough girl look no longer walked into my classroom. Soon these two young women were walking into my classroom, smiling at me and saying “Hi Miss Gould” with the most genuine, beautiful smiles!

I am getting emotional just thinking about them and this awesome memory!

I ended up LOVING these girls and enjoyed teaching them and their classmates so much. At one point towards the end of the school year, there was an assembly. I don’t remember it, but I do remember it must have been about the birds and the bees because the boys and girls were separated.

What I do remember was that afterwards I had all the girls in my classroom. I remember sitting on a desk in the middle of them and they were all circled around me. They were asking me personal questions about my first boyfriend and you can probably guess with your imagination what things they wanted to know.

I shared with them my thoughts and experiences.

Afterwards another student, whom I felt close to, said to me. “Everyone likes you a little more now.”

A fake smile turned into a real smile. The real smiles created a trusting relationship. That trusting relationship grew into something more.

Thank you Mother – I mean Saint – Teresa.

That advice – ‘smile at people and it will help you love them’ stuck with me. I have used outside of the classroom as well as in it.

I totally and highly recommend trying it out. Especially with the people you see often who you are having a hard time loving. In fact, I need to really follow it again too.

Although I could not find the original wording of the way I recall reading that advice; I have found this quote:

“Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing.” Mother Teresa

The gift of a smile is something all of us can give. No matter how old we are, how much money we have or what experiences we are going through – we can give the gift of a smile.

Simple. Powerful. Universal.

If you smile at me I will understand / ‘Cause that is something / Everybody everywhere does in the same language” – Wooden Ships, Crosby, Stills & Nash

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Interested in learning more from Mother, soon to be officially Saint – Teresa? Check out these affiliate links!

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Mother Teresa: Come Be My Light: The Private Writings of the Saint of Calcutta

Mother Teresa and Me: Ten Years of Friendship

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