Faith is a Tremendous Parachute
As I walked into my grandparents apartment I would greet my Grandpop with a Hi, how are you?
His answer would either be:
TREE-mendous
or
SPEC-tacular!
Using the word tremendous is a tribute to him. Not only because he would say the word, but also the lesson he provided with that simple one word response to a question we hear often.
How are you?
How do you respond to that question?
You would think all these years later, I would be better at responding to it. I’m guilty of saying,
“good” or “well” or even worse . . . just saying okay and listing a complaint!
As I reflect upon my Grandfather’s response, I immediately realize how incredible this man was.
You see, my Grandfather had to have both of his legs amputated. When I was asking him, “how are you” he was bound to a wheelchair- because he had no legs! And that was just one thing in his life that would give him license to say, “eh, I’m okay”.
I’ll keep the other things he was balancing in his life to myself out of respect for my family, but trust me, no one would have faulted him for giving a humdrum answer.
I want to share with you how our Catholic faith has been a gift to me my whole life, but I recognized it most when I suffered from depression in my mid-20’s.
Our secular world understands the power of an attitude of gratitude. Our faith directs us to give thanks. I think that this advice – to be grateful, was only the beginning of how my firm belief in God prevented me from doing the unthinkable.
Gratitude is the first step, not the end in a life of a Christian.
It’s a good first step, but that alone would not have been enough to help me climb out of my season of despair.
Can a Catholic really suffer from depression?
Even though I earned a BS in Psychology, I hesitated and fought with every fiber of my being the idea of going to speak with a counselor.
I mean, when I was feeling down in college, I went to the counselor’s office once or twice, but grown up world? Seeking out a therapist? No way, I didn’t need that.
But thankfully, at the age of 25, when almost all of my friends were engaged or married, I met a couple new friends.
One had a therapist she liked so much, she waited tables to pay her because she wasn’t covered by our insurance. It was this friend that suggested every night I write down 5 things I was grateful for.
Some nights, I had a hard time.
Once I thanked God for Sprite.
At least one other night I stopped at three things.
I was in a rough, dark place.
Another friend I made had gotten married, and by the time her honeymoon was over, her husband was already gone and with someone else. She had married her high school sweetheart, and it ended very quickly.
This heartbreaking situation led her to a therapist. My friend and I would go for walks and talk about our broken hearts and undesirable place in life. Eventually, this friend convinced me to go see her therapist.
I went.
It was HORRIBLE. I did not gel with this woman at all. I felt worse when I left.
But that therapist saw that we were not compatible, and recommended I go see HER therapist!
Which I did. Eventually this new counselor suggested I take medicine to help lift my spirits.
I refused.
I honestly wondered, “is it okay for me to get medication to feel happier?”
I thought, “no one living in Jesus’ time was getting medicine because they felt really sad. What is wrong with me that it’s come to a point where even the therapist can’t help me – she’s just telling me to take medicine??”
I went to a priest and asked him,
“Is it morally wrong for me to take medicine for depression? I mean, no one living in Jesus’ time was looking for a pill to make them feel less sad!”
Father John answered me with words like this:
“Let me tell you what my mom said to me. She said, ‘this world is so fast’. The world today is so much faster than the world Jesus and the Apostles lived in. Our culture and the speed of our modern day technology is affecting our mental health. It’s okay to take medicine if you need it to help you with depression. There is no sin in that.”
I don’t remember his exact words – except him quoting his mother and how she said, “this world that we live in today is so fast . . .” THAT I remember.
And friends, this was before we had smart phones.
Our world is even faster now.
Why refer to your faith as a parachute?
So, I was questioning why I use the term parachute, but as I reflected on this topic, I realized . . .
What do parachutes do?
A parachute slows the body in motion.
As I type this I can hear cars, motorcycles and trucks traveling between 40 to 60 miles an hour down a major road not so far away from my house. In the earlier hours, if the train goes by about a mile away, I can hear that too.
Not more than two feet from where I sit is a small rectangle that can enrapture me in a world of TikTok videos, Instagram reels, YouTube shorts and more.
The speed at which we can physically travel and the speed at which we are observing visual stimuli is like nothing before in human history.
Yet, if we pick up Scripture, God’s word tells us to “Be still and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10)
God knows what we need. God knows what is good for us.
Good and evil are real things.
There was a time when I felt so incredibly sad, that I just wanted to jump off my roof.
But our faith teaches us that God does not want us to take our life. That simple thought is one way my faith slowed me down.
But that was only the beginning.
We live in an age where psychology is a science.
In our culture and time many people see the value and the need to seek mental health. Research has been done that proves actions, such as meditation,
elicits the relaxation response,
decreases depression
and improves over all health.
Research also has found that writing feelings down in a journal can decrease anxiety and increase self-awareness.
But our faith was teaching these things long before scientists, therapists and college professors were.
Our Lady, years before psychologists conducted experiments proving the positive impact mediation has on the mind and body, suggested that we:
“pray the Rosary every day for peace”.
In a world that doesn’t stop, our Scripture says over and over again: “Be still”.
How to battle depression as a Catholic Christian
During my twenties, I started doing two things that were so good for my soul and my mood.
I started praying the Rosary out loud with friends and I started prayer journaling.
These two things (along with the help of an antidepressant) slowed me down and helped me as I wrestled with my broken heart.
Prayer Journaling
I’ve explored the topic of prayer journaling many times since I started this blog. One helpful article that you might find interesting was my conversation with Catholic Psychologist, Dr. Matt Breuninger
What does a Catholic Psychologist Say About the Benefits of Prayer Journaling?
In this conversation, Dr. B points out that:
Prayer journaling allows us to:
- create a space where we invite God in and ask Him for His safety and comfort
- courageously approach dangerous topics
One statement made by Matt Breuninger in this talk was one he made after this point. He said:
Journaling really gives us the space to approach very difficult and painful material. It can reduce our avoidance. It can reduce our anxiety, our stress and our overwhelm. When we journal we are approaching instead of avoiding.
Starting a prayer journal, to some, is a challenge. I urge you, just start.
This post was inspired by a talk I gave on the feast of Saint Teresa of Avila, who is credited with saying, “You pay God a compliment by asking great things of him.”
Copy that quote and ask for big things.
Thank the Lord for the last breath you took.
Today is the feast of Saint Pope John Paul II. If there is one quote I want my children to always know, especially when they are feeling sad, it’s this one:
“I plead with you — never, ever give up on hope; never doubt, never tire and never become discouraged. Be not afraid.”
Write it down. Ask God to restore your hope.
If you would like more help with starting a prayer journal, here is a post for you!
How to start a Prayer Journal in Three Easy Steps
Praying the Rosary will bring comfort to your hurting heart
I feel like the Rosary is like Neosporin. It’s a little something to put on a wound that is not an instant cure, but it helps.
Praying the Rosary out loud allows those physical benefits modern researchers have been able to discover and measure.
Praying out loud with at least one person is so incredibly soothing. Don’t be shy. Find a friend or a relative and ask them to pray with you.
As I write this I am preparing for the 2024 Prayer Wine Chocolate Retreat. One thing we do at every PWC Retreat is pray the Rosary as a group.
This retreat is for women – so if you fit that description, join us!! Find out more here!
The Rosary is a powerful prayer. Our Lady of the Rosary wants to pull us closer to her Son.
She’s literally throwing us a rope and pulling us up closer to heaven with each prayer.
Grab the rope. Keep praying.
One day, someone will need you to tell your whole story.
Trust me.
Until then, hang on and look ahead.
May God Bless You Abundantly,
Hugs and Prayers,
Amy
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