In the past four years, two of my closest friends have become widows. Two men that were not only husbands of my friends, but also my close friends, have passed away. Both of them were in their mid-30’s. I think of my young widowed friends and their small children every day. But with all of life’s busyness and responsibilities, it’s difficult to help them as much as I think I should.
Sure, I helped them “bury the dead” by being there at the funeral. My husband and I attended the wake, the funeral, the service at the cemetery for one – for the other we were helping prepare the luncheon. We help in any way we can with our time and resources.
I asked my one friend, let’s call her “Molly”, what was it that her friends and family did that was the most helpful as she grieved such an incredible loss. She said, just knowing we are there to call or text anytime was and is a huge comfort. Molly said she was so grateful when people respected her request for space. She also said she knew people prayed for her, she felt it.
I feel the need to repeat that. “Molly” said she knew people prayed for her, she felt it. Molly is not one of my “rosary” friends. Molly and I have been friends since 7th grade, but the closest we’ve ever gotten to pray together is sitting next to one another at Mass. She is not a friend that frequently talks about theology or spiritual living. But Molly said, she felt people praying for her – and she believes in the power of prayer.
So although the Corporal work of Mercy – Bury the Dead, may not seem like enough to give – it is extremely important to give. It is important to physically be present at funerals. It is extremely important that we remember to pray for the dead and his or her’s surviving family. It is important to contribute in that meal train for the next few weeks as the family tries to grasp their “new normal”. And after all of that is done, and time passes, prayer is an incredible gift to continue to give. Pray for the soul of the deceased. Pray for the friend that is mourning. Maybe it is no accident, that this is the last of the corporal works I have to discuss – for it is easily bringing us, through prayer, into the Spiritual Works of Mercy.
Please pray with me:
Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord,
and let perpetual light shine upon them.
May the souls of the faithful departed,
through the mercy of God, rest in peace.
Amen.
Wow. This is so heartbreaking to read. I am so sorry to hear about these losses.
I’m sorry Caroline, I didn’t mean to bring you down! I think the silver lining is neither of these women felt alone in their grief.
This one touched my heart. I do know prayer helped us get through our grief journey as we lost our son. His 10th Anniversary is tomorrow and it feels like yesterday. You can’t imagine that you could go on without the person you lost but prayer helps you to go on one day at a time. God bless you Amy and your friends who have to deal with their loss every day. I will remember them in our prayers.
Oh Maureen, I can’t imagine. My heart goes out to you and your family. Your faith is so strong and amazing. I hope he sends you signs so you know in your heart he is in a better place and you will see him again. Sending you a giant (((HUG)))
Thank you Amy. We do get signs from him often. I know he is happy in heaven and our faith helps us to know we will see him again one day.
I can totally understand where your friend was coming from in being able to feel the prayers. When my cousin passed away 3 years ago, it was so important for her family that we all drew in around her and surrounded them. The other important thing that I’ve learned is that it is SO important to bring up the person who has passed away. Though the conversation can be hard, it is so helpful to know that others have not forgotten.
Thank you for those wise words Amy! I’ve heard that bringing up the person who passed away is a good think recently, so I’m glad you mentioned that and affirmed it! It is so amazing that we can sometimes feel when people have prayed for us! God is good!
What a heartbreaking read. *sniffle*
I’m glad that work of Mercy is done being written about – moving on to the next!