• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Prayer Wine Chocolate

a spiritual journey to motherhood & beyond

  • Home
  • Wine and Chocolate
  • Faith
  • CSMI
  • Adoption
  • Life
  • Prayer Journaling
  • Resources
  • About
  • Contact
  • Be Yourself!: A Journal for Catholic Girls
  • Donate a Be Yourself Journal
  • Catholic Coloring Pages
  • Shop

Mar 5, 2017
Life

Terminate, Interrupt or Choose Life?

This post was written by my friend, Kate Chetta.  Kate was given some devastating news during her second pregnancy.  Please read her story . . . and share . . .

Terminate, Interrupt or Choose Life-

“Poor prenatal diagnosis”– These words are sudden, jarring and unbearable. My world came crashing down when I learned that LILY, my second daughter, bore this horrendous fate. It must be a mistake, I thought; but test after test by the best Maternal Fetal Medicine Specialists in the country made it clear that Lily was extremely sick from something called congenital CMV. The damage to her little body was severe. If she did survive birth, she would likely be severally disabled, with what doctors deemed a “very poor quality of life”.

As I sat in the examination room and the initial shock subsided, I asked the doctors what they would do if they were in my situation. Without hesitation, the doctor said “I would “interrupt” the pregnancy”. My head began to spin as I tried to grasp the meaning of those words. He was telling me to end my pregnancy – to abort my child. In that moment, I fully understood the fear, desperation, and hopelessness experienced by families who are forced to make a choice between what the experts tell them and what their hearts long for.

My husband and I thanked the doctors and went home. We decided we would savor and celebrate whatever time we had with Lily. My husband read to her and kissed my belly, her older sister gave her hugs and told her she loved her. We made a conscious decision to make each day special to celebrate her life, no matter how brief.

KateChettaLilly.jpg

Quite by accident, we learned of a network of parents and professionals who had experienced or worked closely with issues surrounding poor prenatal diagnosis. Volunteers from Lily’s Gift (http://www.lilysgift.org) as it came to be known, offered practical guidance and compassionate and merciful care, focusing on meeting the needs of expectant parents as they sought to honor the life of their baby no matter how frail or how brief.  This was the help we so desperately wanted and needed.  We are so very grateful to Sister Kathleen Schipani of the Archdiocese of Philadelphia and the ministry for giving us a place to turn.

We didn’t need encouragement on how or why to end Lily’s life. We needed to know how we could best honor and remember her. We needed help to sort through any medical decisions we might have to make. And eventually, how to grieve Lily’s death when she was stillborn at 26 weeks.  

There are some that asked why I didn’t abort Lily. I was called selfish for not “letting her go”. I, too, struggled with those unrelenting thoughts. What if she’s suffering? What if she’s scared? My mother’s words eased my fears. “Your baby only knows security, love and protection in your womb. She feels your love and you are all she has ever known.”

We live in a world of instant gratification where patience is no longer a virtue. If things are not working out, we move on and call it a day. For me and my husband, it came down to honoring Lily with her own natural death, in her and God’s time, not ours. Suffering is part of the human condition. But it is our response to suffering that gives meaning to our lives. It is the choices we make, in the midst of our pain, that truly matter.

Lily.jpgOur story doesn’t end with the death of Lily. Through this entire ordeal, we experienced immeasurable love from family, friends, even strangers. It was through this experience that God gave us an incredible insight. Lily, in her brief life, showed us fully the loving heart of God and the goodness of His people. I am blessed to know that she touched the hearts of many and that she is in Heaven, at peace and perfect, praying for her family here on earth.

 

As my mother said in our sweet baby’s eulogy,

“For in our time of pain and vulnerability, a time when it would have been so easy to blame and curse God, Lily took us by the hand and led us straight to the feet of our heavenly Father.  She revealed to us that love is more powerful than death and that peace and wholeness are waiting for us the moment we decide to let go of the burdens that this life brings and enter into God’s loving embrace. Her purpose has been completed – her gift has been given.”

Lily, we understand, your Mommy and Daddy and all of us know – what is beyond all knowing: “When everything passes away – – what remains is Love”.

The above was written by Kate Chetta – Mom of 4 to Sophia,5, Julia, 2, and Dominic, 6 months, and Liliana in Heaven. Married to Gaetano, the bestest man ever for 8 years this May. Have the privilege to be a SAHM to my kids in addition to directing the Jeffersonville A Baby’s Breath. Love hiking, birding and crocheting

The following is a message from Amy 🙂

If you are facing a similar situation, please trust in God’s path. Give Him your child in faith and trust . . .and believe that His love for your child is even greater than your own.

Although Lily’s life ended so soon, there are other stories like this one: Little boy born without a brain can now speak, count, and attend school

Please contact BeNotAfraid if you live in the United States and want more information.

If you are in the Philadelphia area, contact Lily’s Gift.

For those who had a similar situation in the past . . . I am so sorry.  Our hope is to let others know that there is a support network for those who want to choose life or at least want to discuss that choice more.  We pray and hope doctors will also read this and let their patients know that these organizations exist.

May the Lord Bless you – abundantly.

Sincerely in Christ,

Amy

Rachel’s Vineyard offers weekend retreats for women who have terminated pregnancies.

Screen Shot 2017-03-05 at 10.45.31 PM.png

 

 

 

Journal for tweens and teens

 

Share536
Tweet
Pin10
Share
546 Shares
Previous Post: « Paddy and The Wolves: The Saint Patrick’s Day Book for Kids (Book Review)
Next Post: Prayer Journaling with DaySpring’s Illustrated Faith Line [Review and Giveaway] »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Sara @ To Jesus Sincerely says

    March 6, 2017 at 7:17 am

    This is heartbreaking and inspiring at the same time. Thank you for sharing such an amazing story, and for your witness of holding onto the faith through such a tragic loss. I’m so glad you decided to share your story to encourage others to choose life for their child in similar situations. It’s amazing the way you cherished every moment of life your baby had left until God took her home. God bless you, I’ll pray for you and your family, I know the hurt never truly goes away. <3

    • Amy says

      March 6, 2017 at 8:08 am

      Kate Chetta, I hope you got to read this!

  2. Gina says

    March 6, 2017 at 9:52 am

    Oh this is beautiful. What courage! And I believe, no “accident” that Kate stumbled on this group. Such a beautiful reminder that every life is precious and every one valued in God’s eyes. I know that Lily is waiting for her parents in heaven. Blessings to Kate for having the courage to share this.

    • Amy says

      March 6, 2017 at 10:48 am

      Amen!

  3. Ginny says

    March 6, 2017 at 1:36 pm

    What a beautiful story. Those words from Liky’s eulogy are especially touching.

  4. Kirby says

    March 6, 2017 at 4:21 pm

    This is so beautiful Amy! Thank you for sharing the story.

  5. Anni H. says

    March 6, 2017 at 4:55 pm

    Such a beautiful, inspirational story. In the midst of family tragedy and grief, this family was able to shine a bright light on the dignity and worth of even the littlest of us. How remarkable and awe-inspiring that Lily’s family turned their grief into a network aimed at providing love, care, support to those suffering similar outcomes – and, it’s bittersweet they have a saint in heaven, interceding for them on a personal level, and I’m sure praying for continued success for this ministry.

    Thanks for sharing!

  6. Lorna says

    March 16, 2017 at 8:39 am

    What a beautifully told story of pain and love and loss.

  7. Mary says

    March 24, 2017 at 8:38 pm

    So appreciate your sharing of Kate’s story, Amy; thank you Kate for so eloquently telling us about Lily and your story.
    Your mother’s words, Kate, brought tears to my eyes and so touch my heart, that I’m going to save them and cherish them.
    ‘My mother’s words eased my fears. “Your baby only knows security, love and protection in your womb. She feels your love and you are all she has ever known.” ‘
    Fifty years ago I lost my son at about 25 mo; 2 1/2 yr ago my daughter and son-in-law son passed on after 12 days following a catastrophic birth. Such sorrow, such grief; and our Lord is with us in it all. Their is, I think, a profound beauty in walking through this with Him. My love and thanks to each of you, Kate, Kate’s mom, and Amy. And Lily, too!

    • Mary says

      March 24, 2017 at 8:42 pm

      Should have edited before sending post: *son-in-law’s son* and *There is*

    • Amy says

      March 24, 2017 at 9:06 pm

      Mary, I am so sorry for the losses you have endured. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts here. I am going to make sure Kate sees them. God bless you and your family.

  8. Aska says

    January 15, 2018 at 4:01 am

    I really needed to read this. I am 15 weeks pregnant with my second child. I have a genetic disorder that causes severe joint damage and as a result I have been a wheelchair user for several years. This was a unplanned pregnancy and my Dr wanted me to terminate for my health. I wouldn’t shame someone who decided to abort, but I just can’t. It ‘s not went over well with some of our friends because they think it is dangerous and selfish. I suppose they can’t really understand how it feels because they are not in this situation. It’s comforting to know that there are other moms out there who do know how I feel. Thank you for your kindness and sharing your story.

Primary Sidebar

       

Amy is the Co-Founder of CatholicsOnline.net

10 Free resources

10 Free resources

10 free resources for subscribers!

10 free resources for subscribers!

GUIDE: How to Plan your Own Prayer Wine Chocolate Retreat

Be Yourself! Journal

Journal for tweens and teens

prayerwinechocolate

New post up on the blog!!! A few weeks ago I had New post up on the blog!!!

A few weeks ago I had the pleasure of interviewing @askacatholictherapist Dr. Matthew Breuninger 

We talked about why prayer journaling is so beneficial for both our mental and spiritual health.

Read the whole article and tell me what you think!
Link in bio🤗
#prayerjournal #prayerjournaling #Catholicjournal #Catholiccoach #Catholicfamily #Catholicmom #Biblejournal #catholicmentalhealth #beyourselfjournal #Catholics #Catholicsonline #Catholicinfluencer #catholictherapist
Give a child a Catholic book for Easter! Make sure Give a child a Catholic book for Easter!
Make sure they have a BIBLE first!
#readyourBible #Catholicbook #Catholicbooks #Catholicauthor #osv #OurSundayVisitor #osvkids #Catholicsonline #Catholickids #catholicsofinstagram
Do you ever feel like you are not doing enough? O Do you ever feel like you are not doing enough?

Often I need this reminder - God doesn't want us to feel stressed.
He wants us to rely on Him - trust Him.

He wants us to love.
Be patient and kind.

Many saints have discovered this and have advised us in their own words.

Saint Katharine Drexel said, "peacefully do at each moment what needs to be done."

Saint Teresa of Calcutta stated, "never worry about numbers, help one person at a time and start with the person nearest to you."

Saint Therese', the Little Flower, demonstrated again and again how much Jesus delights in her little way.

You don't need to be stressed.
Your little acts of love and trust for Jesus delight Him.

Have a better day 😉
#Catholicquote #LittleFlower #CatholicSaint #Catholicsaints #catholicencouragement #Catholicinspiration #CatholicsofInstagram #CatholicInstagram #ChristiansofInstagram #InstaCatholic #Catholicsocialmedia #CatholicsOnline
Easter is the perfect time to encourage prayer wit Easter is the perfect time to encourage prayer with a gift!
These gifts and more available in my little shop!

#Catholicshop #Catholickids #Catholicwife #CatholicChristian #CatholicEaster
Easter gift ideas for Catholic boys… #Catholicbo Easter gift ideas for Catholic boys…
#Catholicboymom #Catholicmom #Catholic #Catholics #Confirmationgift #CatholicChristian #catholicmemes #catholicreels
Be Yourself Journal on sale for $17.00… today on Be Yourself Journal on sale for $17.00… today only!!!
“Be who you are and be that well. So that you may bring honor to the Master Craftsman whose handiwork you are.”
~Saint Francis DeSales 

#Catholicbooks #CatholicSaints #CatholicMom #Catholicgifts #boystomen #Catholickid #Catholictween ##Catholickids #saintquotes
Striving for Sainthood can be as simple as this… Striving for Sainthood can be as simple as this… 

This type of advice can be really helpful for all of us… especially for a young girl navigating middle school or her early teens.

This advice would have helped me.
Why?

Because it takes some pressure off the high expectations often felt by us as individuals.

It makes God’s will for us feel achievable and realistic.

It’s totally relevant to a student in junior high
(And a slightly stressed out adult)

This page in the Be Yourself embraces scrapbooking fun- just like the back cover. Only this page encourages photographs. Yes, actual printed ones 🎞️📸

Take a deep breath.
Love the next person that comes near you.
#Catholicmom #Catholicsaints #middleschool #juniorhigh #Catholicquotes #inspirationalquotes
A prayer and the story behind the picture… Oh S A prayer and the story behind the picture…

Oh St. Joseph whose protection is so great, so strong, so prompt before the throne of God, 

I place in you all my interests and desires. Oh St. Joseph do assist me by your powerful intercession and obtain for me from your divine son all spiritual blessings through Jesus Christ, our Lord; 

so that having engaged here below your heavenly power I may offer my thanksgiving and homage to the most loving of fathers. 

Oh St. Joseph, I never weary contemplating you and Jesus asleep in your arms. I dare not approach while he reposes near your heart. Press him in my name and kiss his fine head for me, and ask him to return the kiss when I draw my dying breath. 

St. Joseph, patron of departing souls, pray for us.
Amen.

My children had off from school on Friday. I had committed to an hour of Eucharistic Adoration on Fridays from to 2 to 3 during Lent… so since they had off, they had to come with me.
It was stressful.
They CAN NOT sit still.
Once I got one to stop walking around or talking, another one started.
But in the middle of all this… I witnessed a sweet moment.
I hesitated to pull out my phone because I really try not to during Adoration.
But, the beauty of the moment struck me, and I had to capture it.
📸 
Motherhood is hard. Parenting is difficult.
But I’m often reminded it’s like farming… and I’m planting seeds.

I just hope and pray I’m planting more good seeds then bad ones.

Thank goodness we can pray and ask for prayers from others!

Saint Joseph, pray for us!
#Catholic #Catholicmom #mustardseedfaith #catholicteacher #CatholicChristian #CatholicSaint #CatholicSaints #catholicparenting #liturgicalliving
THANK YOU! Thank you! Thank you! If you have left THANK YOU! Thank you!
Thank you!

If you have left a review on Amazon for either of the Be Yourself Journals… thank you from the bottom of my heart!

When you leave a review on Amazon it makes me SO HAPPY… plus it sends a signal to Amazon to show more people these books!
I’d love for more girls to get this book in their Easter Basket this year!

I’m so grateful this book is being used and appreciated!

God is good!

If you like this book and haven’t left a review, please write one! It’s okay if you didn’t buy it from there!

Tag someone with a 10 or 11 year old girl!

#Catholic #Catholicmom #liturgicalliving #litany #Wwp #CatholocChristian #CatholicEaster #CatholicEasterbasket #ComeHolySpirit #trueidentity
I can’t believe in the past week I’ve posted 4 I can’t believe in the past week I’ve posted 4 videos on YouTube!

And last week’s interview with Dr. Matthew Breuninger (@askacatholictherapist ) still has me thinking about the “psychology of prayer journaling “!

The last 4 videos posted consist of two new interviews (Jessica Castillo from @athrivingcatholic and Dr. John Spitzer @johnspitzermd ); 

a box opening of @pinksaltriot ‘s latest JOY BOX and finally 

a “how to” video that demonstrates how girls can design the back cover of Be Yourself: a Journal for Catholic Girls!
Whew!

Dr. John Spitzer shared parenting advice for moms and dads of tweens;

Jessica Castillo shared how our physical and spiritual health are connected;

The Joy Box had some fun surprises… one will be going in my daughter’s Easter Basket;
And my friend’s daughter was the perfect co-host in the “how to design “ video!

Tell me which topic interests you the most… maybe I’ll dedicate an Instagram post highlighting that content!

#Catholic #BeYourselfJournal #CatholicYouTube #Catholicyouth #CatholicsOnline #catholicsofinstagram #Catholicblog #Catholicauthor #Catholicblogger #catholicinspiration #Catholictalk #joybox
FLASH SALE ON BOY’S Journal ends tonight!!! Link FLASH SALE ON BOY’S Journal ends tonight!!!
Link in bio!
#Catholic #Lent #bhlent2023
“I got this for my 10 yr old daughter’s Easter “I got this for my 10 yr old daughter’s Easter basket. She immediately was attracted to it. Later, she came to me and said that it was her favorite item in her basket. She loves it and really has spent time with it. It is motivational, inspirational, engaging and most importantly, designed to encourage a habit of prayer and meditation at a young age. All while focusing on God’s love for us and our uniqueness…”
Review left on Amazon about Be Yourself:a Journal for Catholic Girls
#Catholic #RomanCatholic #BeYourselfJournal #BeYourself #Catholicmom #Catholicgift #Christianyouth #Catholicyouth #journal #prayerjournal #catholiccrafts #Catholics #Tweengirls #tweengirl #Youthministry #bookstagram #Catholicfamily #catholicphotography #Catholicprayers #catholicreels
FLASH SALE!!!! Boy’s journal sale ends MONDAY!!! FLASH SALE!!!!
Boy’s journal sale ends MONDAY!!!
Finish up Lent strong… and add this fun book to an Easter Basket!
Link in bio!
#Catholickids #Catholicmom #Catholicyouth #CatholicChristian #Catholic #catholicyouthministry #Catholicdad #Catholicgift #Eastergift #Easterbook #Easter #easterbasket #Lent
I adore you Jesus, true God, and true man, pres I  adore you Jesus, 
true God, and true man, 
present in the Holy Eucharist, 
kneeling before you 
and united in spirit 
with all the faithful on earth 
and all the saints in heaven. 

In gratitude for so great a blessing, 
I love you with all my heart, 
for you are worthy of all praise 
and adoration. 

Lord Jesus Christ, may I never offend you with my lack of love. 

May your Eucharistic presence refresh me in body and soul. 

Mary, Mother of the Eucharistic Lord, pray for me 
and obtain for me a greater love for Jesus. Amen.

#EucharisticAdoration #Lent #EucharisticRevival #BlessedSacrament #40hours #prayforvocations #Catholicmom #Catholicsonline #manyhailmarysatatime #catholicsofinstagram #Holyhour
Seriously, if all the @catholicsonline shops had a Seriously, if all the @catholicsonline shops had a mall I’d… I don’t even know… it would be AMAZING!!!
#RomanCatholic #Catholicgifts #Catholicmom #Catholicwoman #Catholicwife #Christiangifts #SaintJude #CatholicSaints #Catholicshop #Eastergift #Eastergifts #Catholicsonline #Catholicreels #catholicsofinstagram #prolife
Have you ever seen a statistic and thought… thes Have you ever seen a statistic and thought… these numbers are NOT in my favor?

Years ago, I was lonely, depressed and wondering if I would ever not be lonely and depressed.

I dreamed of falling in love and getting married.

But, I wanted to marry a faithful Catholic man… and I believe I saw that only 22% (?) of Americans were Catholic.

And then I thought…
Half of them aren’t men, a large percentage are not practicing and … also how many are BOOMERS?

Lucky for me, God math goes like this…
5 loaves 
2 fish
=
5,000 meals and leftovers 

This is my handsome husband and our awesome nephew with the Bishop that Confirmed him on Friday.
Matt was -and is- such a proud Sponsor and Uncle!
God bless Grayson Patrick FRANCIS!

Thank you God for all of your gifts!!!
“You pay God a compliment when you ask big things of Him.” ~ Saint Teresa of Avila

#Catholic #confirmationsponsor #CatholicSacraments #EucharisticRevival #EucharisticAdoration #ComeHolySpirit #Saintquotes #CatholicSaints
Don’t you love when a plan comes together for a Don’t you love when a plan comes together for a retreat and you see joyful faces! 

Listen, this is the best retreat hack for Catholic girls!
****The Be Yourself Journal Scrapbooking activity.****

Give each girl a Be Yourself Journal.
Explain how, “We are all called to holiness but we take different paths.” ~ Saint Katharine Drexel.

Have each girl pick out a Holy card and two Catholic stickers.

Put scrapbooking paper and Catholic washi-tape (thank you @thestumpofjesse ) on the tables and get them started with decorating the back of their journals.

As they work add more stickers and quote cards to their table.

Point out that they were all given the same set of instructions… yet each cover design is unique.

The same is true for their calling!
God has a unique mission for each individual.

He calls us to follow the Commandments, embrace His Word and trust the teachings of the Church…
same set of basic instructions, different yet BEAUTIFUL results when followed!
“Be who God meant you to be and you’ll set the world on fire!” ~Saint Catherine of Siena
Huge thank you to the women who donated journals and holy cards!!!
#holycards #Catholickids #Saintquotes #BeYourselfJournal #Catholic #Catholicstickers #Catholiccrafts #Saintquotes #Catholicyouth #Catholicyouthgroup #Catholicretreat #Confirmationretreat #Catholicretreat #catholicteacher
Not sure what to do with all those prayer cards? Not sure what to do with all those prayer cards? 

Holy cards can be a fantastic prayer journal prompt. 

Copy the prayer off the back and glue the card to the page ;next to, underneath or above where you wrote the prayer).

Follow me for more prayer journaling tips!
#Catholicjournal #biblejournal #Prayerjournal #prayerjournaling #bissisterhood #Catholicsonline #Jesusandcoffee #Lentideas
Getting ready for a Confirmation Retreat this week Getting ready for a Confirmation Retreat this weekend!

So excited to help these young Catholics see that each is called to holiness… but each mission is unique and unrepeatable!

Huge thank you to the women who donated journals for the retreat (11 donated!!!) and the women from my Bible study group who donated Holy cards!

If you would like to donate a Journal for one of the girls attending the retreat this weekend… send me a private message and I’ll explain how!

Holy cards are GREAT prayer journal prompts!

Which Holy card would you put in your prayer journal?
#prayerjournal #Catholicsaint #Confirmationretreat #Catholicretreat #catholicprayer
Keep at it!!! Don’t give up and Don’t give in! Keep at it!!! Don’t give up and Don’t give in!!! “The world offers you comfort… but you were not made for comfort, you were made for GREATNESS!”
Pope Benedict XVI
#Catholic #Saintquotes #prayfastgive #Lent #Catholicreels #Catholicmeme #Catholicmemes #catholicsofinstagram #Catholicmom #faithandfamily
Load More Follow on Instagram

Footer

       
a spiritual journey to motherhood & beyond

Copyright © 2023 · Cultivate Theme theme by Restored 316