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Mar 27, 2017
Faith

From Cross to Blessing: 3 Hardships that Actually Make Life Better

crosstoblessinglifegetsbetter

Have you ever gone through a time in your life where you just wished you could see how it all worked out in the future?
Often when we struggle, we hear people say, “Everything happens for a reason.”

I have refrained from punching those people many times.

You?

There were times in my life where I wished I could fast-forward, or at least look into a magic mirror and see how it all panned out.

I wonder if that is why some say with age comes wisdom.  We are not able to look ahead, but we are able to look back.  As I look back, I see the fruit the struggles bore . . . and I see how some crosses were actually blessings.

If you know of anyone carrying similar crosses now, please share my story with them and give them a glimpse of what the future might look like . . . I know when I was going through it, stories of hope found in  Chicken Soup for the Soul – or anywhere else I could find them, helped me keep the faith and dream of better days.

crosstoblessing.jpg

This weekend I told a priest that my cross of infertility was actually a blessing, because it brought us our son.  He responded that all our crosses are blessings, it’s just sometime we can actually see the blessing.

Hmmmm . . .

I know some crosses seem to have no silver lining, but I can recall some major challenges that brought me tears and many prayers of “why?” to God.  Probably the first heavy cross I remember carrying started in elementary school and lasted until I was almost 16.  That one was . . .

Being a nerd.

I remember being lonely.  I was often rejected.  I was made fun of.  I was not cool.

I was not pretty.  I was not talented.

It hurt.  It lasted years. I eventually tried to fit in by cursing like a sailor, smoking an occasional cigarette and eventually acting angry all the time.  I think as a young teen, anger demanded more respect than crying all the time.

But thankfully, a thought entered my mind around the age of 15.  That thought was, when things upset you – you can choose to be angry or sad.  Angry people hurt people.

I didn’t want to hurt anyone.  I knew what it was like to be hurt.

Being a nerd taught me empathy.

I became extremely sensitive to those who did not fit in with the crowd.  I found myself defending others.  Sometimes, I found myself not defending others – and my conscience knew to point those time out to me.  I found myself no longer being the extremely shy girl I once was . . . to the girl that offered her friendship and attention.

I wish I could talk to every young girl going through something similar now.  I would assure them that God has a mission for them – to love the unloved; and this is His training.  This reference may be lost on some readers, but I can’t help but think of the movie the Karate Kid.  “Daniel son” was told to wash cars and paint a fence – and all he wanted to do was learn Karate.  He respected Mr. Miyagi – the teacher – but questioned, “when will I learn Karate?”  He then was shown how he was learning Karate . . . “wax on, wax off” and “paint the fence” were actually Karate moves of defense.

karate.jpg

Being a nerd helped me develop a strong character.  I learned to act out of sympathy and love – and not out of a need for the approval of others.

Being Single and Depressed.

In my 20’s I lived in at least 5 apartments.  I had roommates that moved in and out .. . and most of them moved out because they got engaged and married.  I ended up living alone for a little while.  I remember how depressing it was to eat dinner alone.  I remember wondering if anything happened to me . . . how many days would it take friends or family to even notice.  As I write this I can’t believe how sad I was . . . thank God that time has passed.

It was during the time I lived in my own apartment that I started prayer journaling and a group of us started praying the Rosary together.

Those times when I felt like I had no one – I clung to the One who loves me more than I can imagine, and who is truly always with us.


In that prayer journal that I started in this time of my life . . . I wrote an idea for a book for young girls (inspired by my previous cross).  I titled the book, “Be Yourself: A Journal for Young Girls”. Although the title is slightly different, that book has been written, a contract with a publisher has been signed, and pre-sales begin April 17th!!!

Not only did grow closer to Our Lord by using a journal to help me pray; this time period allowed me to make friends that I still pray with and care for.  And in addition to those amazing blessings, I wrote a book!

If you are interested in purchasing this book and what to know when it is available; subscribe to our email list!!!

Infertility

I wrote about this cross being a blessing here: Infertility: Carrying the Cross with Hope.

Before I became a mother, I talked to a woman named Jeanne who adopted all three of her children on the phone about adoption.  Jeanne assured me that she

Thanks God for infertility at least 3 times a day.

I never forgot those words.

My husband and I love our son more than we could imagine loving anyone – ever.  He is such a gift to us from God.  We are so grateful that we are his parents.  Adoption made me a very lucky momma!

I hope that whatever cross you are bearing passes soon.  Until then, remember . . .

Don’t punch the “everything happens for a reason” people in the face.

Sincerely,

Amy



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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Kristi @ Hail Marry says

    March 27, 2017 at 1:01 pm

    Amy, what a fantastic post! I love the optimism you display here. Congratulations on your book! It sounds wonderful!

    • Amy says

      March 27, 2017 at 3:14 pm

      Thank you Kristi!!!

  2. LaNeshe says

    March 27, 2017 at 1:04 pm

    So, so, true. We don’t always realize it at the time, but there are often blessings whose root are in hard times. That’s the thing about faith. I don’t know why we had the pregnancy losses before having my daughter, but I know that she is perfect and meant for us.

    • Amy says

      March 27, 2017 at 3:15 pm

      I am sorry you experienced those losses. I imagine your love and appreciation for your daughter is much like ours for our son <3

  3. Anni says

    March 27, 2017 at 3:54 pm

    I am one of those “everything happens for a reason” people, and I own it! That said, I try very hard to not say it to others because I know it makes some people bristle.

    But, your story is proof there is a silver lining, and sometimes we do have to dig deep to find it. When I look back on my life experiences, it’s so easy to see how God’s hand was playing, and there was a reason for my struggles. But, there is the saying “hindsight is 20/20” for a reason.

    Awesome reminder to turn to God as your source of comfort and encouragement. Thanks!

    • Amy says

      March 27, 2017 at 5:53 pm

      Thank you so much Anni!!!

  4. Sara @ To Jesus Sincerely says

    March 27, 2017 at 5:26 pm

    I love the way you saw joy in all these sorrows. The beautiful thing is, as I read these, even though they don’t perfectly describe me, I was able to see myself in them. And I was able to draw the parallels and find the blessings in my own hardships. Thanks for this awesome read today!

    • Amy says

      March 27, 2017 at 5:53 pm

      Thank you Sara! I am so happy you enjoyed reading it!

  5. Katina says

    March 28, 2017 at 8:20 am

    Very inspiring to have overcome these things.

    • Amy says

      March 28, 2017 at 9:26 am

      Thanks Katina!

  6. Kate says

    March 28, 2017 at 10:50 am

    This is such a beautiful perspective. A priest actually just brought up the joy of the cross in the confessional on Saturday, so it is a blessing to see tangible examples of that in your post. Thank you for sharing!

    • Amy says

      March 28, 2017 at 3:08 pm

      Wow . . . how about that? God’s timing can be pretty amazing!!!

  7. Jean Schoonover-Egolf says

    March 28, 2017 at 2:57 pm

    I can’t wait to buy your prayer journals from my girls, and I have already told a couple other families who were looking for prayer journal recommendations about it! Great post, Amy.

    • Amy says

      March 28, 2017 at 3:08 pm

      Thank you so much Jean!!!

  8. Leslie says

    March 28, 2017 at 5:19 pm

    I think this is an inspiring and well-written post, and I do believe we can reap blessings from our crosses, but I don’t believe everything happens for a reason. 🙂 I believe that God helps us to find the blessings in our crosses, but the crosses themselves often are just a sad result of our fallen world. An example: no doubt we have experienced many blessings after our house burning down, but I just don’t believe God decided to burn down my house on purpose. I won’t punch you (or anyone) in the face if you disagree though.

    • Amy says

      March 29, 2017 at 8:35 am

      I understand what you are saying . . . that’s why I have to refrain from punching people sometimes lol!

  9. Trina says

    March 29, 2017 at 6:30 am

    Congrats on the book!!! So exciting for you! All those years of hardship has made you into the person you are today. I truly believe we are placed on this earth for a reason and I can’t wait to see how you will help others in so many ways to become the person they want to be.

    • Amy says

      March 29, 2017 at 10:21 am

      Thank you so much Trina!

  10. Amy says

    May 15, 2017 at 9:04 pm

    Thank you so much Allison! I’m so glad you enjoyed this post and love hearing how grateful you are for your children, including your daughter!!

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This type of advice can be really helpful for all of us… especially for a young girl navigating middle school or her early teens.

This advice would have helped me.
Why?

Because it takes some pressure off the high expectations often felt by us as individuals.

It makes God’s will for us feel achievable and realistic.

It’s totally relevant to a student in junior high
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This page in the Be Yourself embraces scrapbooking fun- just like the back cover. Only this page encourages photographs. Yes, actual printed ones 🎞️📸

Take a deep breath.
Love the next person that comes near you.
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A prayer and the story behind the picture… Oh S A prayer and the story behind the picture…

Oh St. Joseph whose protection is so great, so strong, so prompt before the throne of God, 

I place in you all my interests and desires. Oh St. Joseph do assist me by your powerful intercession and obtain for me from your divine son all spiritual blessings through Jesus Christ, our Lord; 

so that having engaged here below your heavenly power I may offer my thanksgiving and homage to the most loving of fathers. 

Oh St. Joseph, I never weary contemplating you and Jesus asleep in your arms. I dare not approach while he reposes near your heart. Press him in my name and kiss his fine head for me, and ask him to return the kiss when I draw my dying breath. 

St. Joseph, patron of departing souls, pray for us.
Amen.

My children had off from school on Friday. I had committed to an hour of Eucharistic Adoration on Fridays from to 2 to 3 during Lent… so since they had off, they had to come with me.
It was stressful.
They CAN NOT sit still.
Once I got one to stop walking around or talking, another one started.
But in the middle of all this… I witnessed a sweet moment.
I hesitated to pull out my phone because I really try not to during Adoration.
But, the beauty of the moment struck me, and I had to capture it.
📸 
Motherhood is hard. Parenting is difficult.
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I just hope and pray I’m planting more good seeds then bad ones.

Thank goodness we can pray and ask for prayers from others!

Saint Joseph, pray for us!
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THANK YOU! Thank you! Thank you! If you have left THANK YOU! Thank you!
Thank you!

If you have left a review on Amazon for either of the Be Yourself Journals… thank you from the bottom of my heart!

When you leave a review on Amazon it makes me SO HAPPY… plus it sends a signal to Amazon to show more people these books!
I’d love for more girls to get this book in their Easter Basket this year!

I’m so grateful this book is being used and appreciated!

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If you like this book and haven’t left a review, please write one! It’s okay if you didn’t buy it from there!

Tag someone with a 10 or 11 year old girl!

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And last week’s interview with Dr. Matthew Breuninger (@askacatholictherapist ) still has me thinking about the “psychology of prayer journaling “!

The last 4 videos posted consist of two new interviews (Jessica Castillo from @athrivingcatholic and Dr. John Spitzer @johnspitzermd ); 

a box opening of @pinksaltriot ‘s latest JOY BOX and finally 

a “how to” video that demonstrates how girls can design the back cover of Be Yourself: a Journal for Catholic Girls!
Whew!

Dr. John Spitzer shared parenting advice for moms and dads of tweens;

Jessica Castillo shared how our physical and spiritual health are connected;

The Joy Box had some fun surprises… one will be going in my daughter’s Easter Basket;
And my friend’s daughter was the perfect co-host in the “how to design “ video!

Tell me which topic interests you the most… maybe I’ll dedicate an Instagram post highlighting that content!

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Finish up Lent strong… and add this fun book to an Easter Basket!
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I adore you Jesus, true God, and true man, pres I  adore you Jesus, 
true God, and true man, 
present in the Holy Eucharist, 
kneeling before you 
and united in spirit 
with all the faithful on earth 
and all the saints in heaven. 

In gratitude for so great a blessing, 
I love you with all my heart, 
for you are worthy of all praise 
and adoration. 

Lord Jesus Christ, may I never offend you with my lack of love. 

May your Eucharistic presence refresh me in body and soul. 

Mary, Mother of the Eucharistic Lord, pray for me 
and obtain for me a greater love for Jesus. Amen.

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Have you ever seen a statistic and thought… thes Have you ever seen a statistic and thought… these numbers are NOT in my favor?

Years ago, I was lonely, depressed and wondering if I would ever not be lonely and depressed.

I dreamed of falling in love and getting married.

But, I wanted to marry a faithful Catholic man… and I believe I saw that only 22% (?) of Americans were Catholic.

And then I thought…
Half of them aren’t men, a large percentage are not practicing and … also how many are BOOMERS?

Lucky for me, God math goes like this…
5 loaves 
2 fish
=
5,000 meals and leftovers 

This is my handsome husband and our awesome nephew with the Bishop that Confirmed him on Friday.
Matt was -and is- such a proud Sponsor and Uncle!
God bless Grayson Patrick FRANCIS!

Thank you God for all of your gifts!!!
“You pay God a compliment when you ask big things of Him.” ~ Saint Teresa of Avila

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Don’t you love when a plan comes together for a Don’t you love when a plan comes together for a retreat and you see joyful faces! 

Listen, this is the best retreat hack for Catholic girls!
****The Be Yourself Journal Scrapbooking activity.****

Give each girl a Be Yourself Journal.
Explain how, “We are all called to holiness but we take different paths.” ~ Saint Katharine Drexel.

Have each girl pick out a Holy card and two Catholic stickers.

Put scrapbooking paper and Catholic washi-tape (thank you @thestumpofjesse ) on the tables and get them started with decorating the back of their journals.

As they work add more stickers and quote cards to their table.

Point out that they were all given the same set of instructions… yet each cover design is unique.

The same is true for their calling!
God has a unique mission for each individual.

He calls us to follow the Commandments, embrace His Word and trust the teachings of the Church…
same set of basic instructions, different yet BEAUTIFUL results when followed!
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Huge thank you to the women who donated journals and holy cards!!!
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Not sure what to do with all those prayer cards? Not sure what to do with all those prayer cards? 

Holy cards can be a fantastic prayer journal prompt. 

Copy the prayer off the back and glue the card to the page ;next to, underneath or above where you wrote the prayer).

Follow me for more prayer journaling tips!
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Getting ready for a Confirmation Retreat this week Getting ready for a Confirmation Retreat this weekend!

So excited to help these young Catholics see that each is called to holiness… but each mission is unique and unrepeatable!

Huge thank you to the women who donated journals for the retreat (11 donated!!!) and the women from my Bible study group who donated Holy cards!

If you would like to donate a Journal for one of the girls attending the retreat this weekend… send me a private message and I’ll explain how!

Holy cards are GREAT prayer journal prompts!

Which Holy card would you put in your prayer journal?
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Keep at it!!! Don’t give up and Don’t give in! Keep at it!!! Don’t give up and Don’t give in!!! “The world offers you comfort… but you were not made for comfort, you were made for GREATNESS!”
Pope Benedict XVI
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New post up on the blog!! I found some awesome Hol New post up on the blog!!
I found some awesome Holy Spirit themed gift ideas!
Link in bio!
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Holy Spirit activate!!! New gift guide up!!! One m Holy Spirit activate!!!
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One might say … these gifts are on FIRE!!!!
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Need Lent? #Catholicreels #Catholics #CatholicChri Need Lent?
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I need your help! This week I'm putting my final I need your help!

This week I'm putting my final touches on two talks . . .

One is for the Catholic Writer's Conference this weekend (it's virtual) and the other is for a Confirmation Retreat (live and in-person)!

How can you help?
In two ways… but I’m just going to ask you for one favor today… and that is, please answer these questions in the comments!

Have you ever purchased a book that you saw on social media? 

If yes, please share what motivated you to buy that book?

Also, tell me - where did you see the book on social media?  Facebook, Instagram, Twitter?  Some where else?

Your comments will help Catholic authors!

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